My Ongoing Journey to get the twitter handle I want

Motive

As of this writing, my twitter handle is @zmessymoney. Not the most professional thing on the market. While it was all fun and games in high school and college, I think the time has come for me to shout into the void from a more respectable stump. Given that, I’ve decided to hunt for some “Zach Miller” twitter handle, given that that’s my name. There’s a few that are in my scopes.

@zach is a non starter. As much as I love it, the handle looks active, and I’m sure this is a highly contested name. While it would be nice, it’s a pipe dream for now. @zachm is too active, but @zachh is a better chance. While my last name is Miller, at least the second H is not too far off the mark. @zaach is promising as well. @zachmiller is also not likely. Again, too active. @zach_miller is pretty promising. No tweets for just under a decade, doesn’t look active anymore. For now, this is the favorite.

Approach

So, I want a twitter handle. Big whoop. Why should I get it? After all, I’m sure there are plenty of people that want twitter handles they can’t have. There are documented cases of popular twitter handles being sold, stolen, squatted, and who knows what else.

STEP 1: OPERATION ASK NICELY

I asked my top choice nicely if I could have the handle.

I doubt this will work, but if it does work, it’s probably the easiest way of making it work. I’ll give him a day or two to respond, but again, I’m not hopeful here.

STEP 2: TWITTER SUPPORT

As of December 11th, 2018, the account that I’d like has been suspended. Unfortunately, I still can’t register that account, Twitter has a policy not to do so.

This means that even if I were to contact Twitter support with another account, I’d still have to deal with this. So I might as well consider step 3.

STEP 3: GET A TRADEMARK

Yeah, it’s ridiculous that I have to do this. Maybe I should just get big on Mastodon or something. Getting a trademark could cost me a couple hundred bucks. Plus there’s this whole process you gotta go through.

That’s about where we’re at right now. I want the name, but unless I can find more value out of the trademark, it might be a no go. Even if I got the trademark, there’s no guarantee that I’d be able to get that name.

I could get a state level trademark: Those only run about $55, and it might be worth a shot.

STEP 3b: GET A MASTODON

I registered Mastodon accounts.

STEP 4: GIVE UP

Yep! Unfortunately, I just don’t think it’s worth it to register a trademark for the opportunity to get this handle. I would much rather see if I can post somewhat regular updates, and then try to pivot into getting the perfect handle.